A Momentary Lapse

Saturday, May 31, 2008

Mary had a little problem

Mary had a little problem which she kept within her heart
Never would it leave her, never will they part
She fought to let it go so that she could be free
But it always came back to her hence, she let it be

It nagged in her head and her heart and tore her brick wall down
It closed out every door and made the children frown
It ripped Mary inside part by part til she couldn't take it no more
Mary went to a place where no one had gone before

Some people wondered where, some people wondered how
Some people just didn't care, or just wouldn't bother now
She tried to tell them of this thing that now etched in her skin
But no one heard her, no one listened, her life source wearing thin

Mary had a little problem she knew not what to do
She could only pray for her life and live til the will is through.

eliZABeth 9:25 PM

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Mary had a little lamb

Mary had a little lamb whose fleece was white as snow
It was lovely, sweet and cuddly, and protected her from the cold.
Every where that Mary went, that lamb was sure to go
Then one fine day that little lamb grew up and left her so.

Mary had a little lamb...

Mary...

HAD.

eliZABeth 5:21 AM

Mary had a little thought

Her meds aren't working.

eliZABeth 3:08 AM

Monday, May 26, 2008

Mary had a little ...

Mary had a little secret - a box she kept under her bed.
She never spoke or said a word of what was in her head.
When she was 3, she figured that she'd already lost her dad,
But never thought she'd lose her mom to life's most painful dread.

When she was 7, she moved away from all the glamourous pain.
Starting anew, she fought to find more meaning to be sane.
At the age of 10, she turned away and found all things a bane,
Then four years later she bled and died, and her life began again.

Mary had a little secret - a box she kept under her bed.
She never spoke or said a word of what it's contents said.
She went to church and prayed and such but nothing seemed to matter
When she spoke she was never heard, so she figured silence would be better.

She goes back home and opens the box and puts a polaroid inside.
Everyday for the years of her excuse called life, in it, she would hide.
A year later, she had a friend who somehow earned her trust.
Mary could finally step into the light and not just live for dusk.

She brought him home, up the stairs and showed him to her room
She locked the door behind them, with only the light of the moon
Mary took out her box and told him to keep it hush
She showed him each polaroid and they both burnt their past.

A month later, they stopped talking, he didn't even reply
Mary sat in her room, alone again and couldn't help but cry
She opened her empty box and stared blankly into its space
She closed her eyes and slid in a polaroid under her weeping face.

Mary had a little secret - a box she kept under her bed.

eliZABeth 1:48 PM

United

I'm really sorry for this lame excuse I call photoshopping skill. But I've tried to make these pictures look better cos they had extremely BAD lighting.

I ♥ Revolution

Freebies and sticker (bought)

My very obvious balloon that has been consumed.

Just a little...

Hello

See...Bad photoshopping.

HAHA.

Another bad excuse.

SARA!!!

Ah Pang.

Helium consumption

Photographer: Shaun Pang

There. My wonderful day. Can't wait for another of THOSE days.

eliZABeth 3:11 AM

Friday, May 23, 2008

My eyes are sore

Its not that I don't appreciate it. I do.
Its just a lot to ask from me, especially when I know its not special treatment.
Anyone who knew what was going on would know I'd never give her special treatment.

I don't know what to tell you. Plus I'm on the verge of giving up.
Using the last of my energy to convice you is gonna render me absolutely useless for the whole weekend.
Ok. Sorry. That is gonna be my only response. I'm sorry I'll try not to screw things up again.

Sorry I'm not stepping up.
Sorry I'm less than mediocre.
Sorry I'm useless as people in my family have mentioned time and time again.
Sorry I'm so talentless.
Sorry for everything I am and not.

-caseclosed-

My identity is in God even though I'm a complete idiot and a total bum. (in a bad way)

eliZABeth 2:44 AM

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

one of those days

Well, today had upsides and downsides.
+Luke came for a while
+I hadn't had lunch with classmates/teammates since last year first sem til today
+Got Shaunneh's MSN. (not really an upside la)
+Went for supper with part of Arumugamuthuparapap
-Feeling sian
-Feeling sian cos of ____
-Feeling sian cos of midpoint
-Feeling sian cos of a whole lot of crap

On the brightside, I took pictures.

And yet, I feel empty.

eliZABeth 4:29 AM

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

and there was you

lizzay.come stay says:ok. i need you to talk me out of liking ____.i keep thinking and thinking and thinking
moomeemaa says:woman snap out
lizzay.come stay says:haha
moomeemaa says:donlike ____
lizzay.come stay says:LOL!
moomeemaa says:bang your head with your teddy bear or spongebob.repeat i hate ____ i wont like him for 100000000 then say ok!
lizzay.come stay says:you're making me giggle. actually ah, im thinking very psychosis now.
if you say a person's name, it will imprint in your mind. but if you say a person's name with negative verbs in your sentance, what does it do?cos if i say "i dont like _____" many times, will i like him more or less? then comes the bloody reasoning.
ok. that worked.

I'm surprised.
I really like the feeling of not liking anyone.
Its AWESOME.
Then you also realise at different stages of your life, where you stand emotionally, spiritually and physically, how you've grown and mutated!(or not)

I was just talking about going overseas to study.
I'm already thinking how I'm gonna miss all you guys so badly.
Then about the aftermath when I get back, if the guys who've gone to NS and back will mature or become the very thing I'm afraid of - them being less sensitive. Of course I think that this is only a biased thought due to the fact that I based my assumption on one person. (guess who. no points)

(aside)PA!!! DI!!! Feels like forever and I really miss you guys.

Thank you God for a wonderful Sunday! Such special people. =)

P.S. Shaun I'll kick your butt cos you weren't working when I visited your shop.

come, stay here with me.

eliZABeth 4:12 AM

Monday, May 19, 2008

Hush

Hush now, be still and things might just be
I don't need any more of this catastrophe
There's nothing more I want that this
Being as we are
Being as we are

Hush now, thy thoughts shalt not run dry
Sweet, how your touch as soft as a sigh
No matter of fact can pull me through
Being here with you
Being here with you

Hush now, thy voice be as man shalt not say
Ever my waking dreams run far away
Though there may be, perchance it'd see me through
Being here with you
Being here with you

Now hush.

eliZABeth 3:30 AM

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Waiting for the Sahara rain

Proverbs 31:30
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

Thats right.
She's waiting for the Sahara to rain.

She walked in, head down and took a glance.
He sat in the aisle, looking as he always does - calm.
She took a seat at the back, able to control darting looks but still, her mind was occupied.
"What difference does this make from 7 years ago?"
She had no answer. She knew it was just plain infatuation.
A void had to be filled.
So she shruged it off and went on, begging the LORD for something better.

Did you know that I love you?

eliZABeth 2:26 AM

Friday, May 09, 2008

Disclaimer: This is merely the brainstorming and release of the mind and NOTHING ELSE.

Alright. In place of some quiz, I'd rather blog.

Well, today was an ok day. I spent my day in TP (yes) with Priya and made plans for a get together already! oh yea.
I met Japheth and Priya's friends (who are really nice and I'm waiting for the blog address of a girl with caked make up)

Besides that, I also enjoyed the few minutes I got to be alone at home. Unfortunately, I spent it eating dinner. Next time I get the chance I'd really like to spend time worshipping, which I don't get to do cos my mom watches TV and she wouldn't go away. And when I do, she comes and tells me completely unrelated stuff to do with the toilet or something. How on earth will I be able to worship? How did I cope before? I stayed up late into the night. Much like now, only I can't really do that now after that hospital incident in NZ. (it wasn't just an allergy)

I'm getting so sick of everything I feel like giving up. I'm so so so so so so so so so so so so so so completely and utterly tired I can't wait to go to NZ, also ignoring the fact that I could die there with that unknown allergy attack.

I have this card that says "Are you ready to meet Him?"
It served as a reminder (but I ran out of cards so I used it as a birthday card - you know who you are).
I really think I am, also bearing in mind that I am the most imperfect person, thinking about countless terrible things to do to people and yet trying so hard to shut it out and love despite being used. YES PASTOR REUBEN. THAT MEANS DOORMAT.
And having lied to some people I respect a lot.
My accountability has dropped to ground zero and I'm scouring and screaming from within.

Oh Father! Drag me out of the pit kicking and screaming and yet when I reach the surface I will praise You will all I am. Yes. ALL I AM.

all I have VS. all I am
All I have meaning I will worship will offerings and tithe.
All I am would be giving up myself to you.

I stand in sweet surrender knowing all I have is Yours
There's nothing more that I can take with me
I stand in sweet surrender know all I have is You
There's nothing left that I can want but You

I miss so many people and the times we had when we were free.

I need You Lord, more than ever. Save me.

Falling so hard, so fast, this time.

eliZABeth 5:07 AM

Thursday, May 08, 2008

Not any more ordinary

She sat across the room from him
Thinking of all the possibilities
The things that could or never be

Of all the memories that coincide
She remembered, she rationalised
It could not be, it never will

Glances across the room
A little reassuring grin
It was good this way

I love you

eliZABeth 1:35 PM

-

10.55pm post:
Today's REW party was cool.
I had fun.
Really.

Luke was there (which I did not expect).
Pastor Reuben was there (unexpected too).
Uncle Jeff was hilarious. haha.
Mildred, Char and Valarie were cool. (not the cool you think Char.)
Well, overall, I REALLY had fun. It was like back in sec sch only from a different point of view. It was still really cool.
AND JOSE BROUGHT BANANA DURIAN CAKE! AHH. Thank you.
My tummy is happy.
I mean it.
My TUMMY.
haha.
darn it.

I will not blog about replug audition practice.
Lets just say we won't get into Berklee with that kind of talent.

Reminicing after the mention of sec 1 church camp The Awakening.
Mildred's bro, Erwin, Luke and his MCing days, our Terrible experience and...
kt.lw.
goodtimes. good times.

I do this from time to time
Where I can never wake from a bad dream
I do this from time to time
Where I can never say the things I mean
I do this from time to time
Where I like to watch you as you sleep
I do this from time to time
Where I want to taste you as you breathe
I do this from time to time
Where I like to think of you and me

From time to time

11.10pm

eliZABeth 2:55 AM

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

this thing

I dislike reminiscing on all those strange things I did as a kid. Those little crushes and meaningless eyecandies.

Strangely, they all come back. They do. Some are even my friends (whether they know it or not)
Sheepish grin.
But yes. I know now the difference between love and love-nots.

And...

And yet...

I love you.

eliZABeth 9:40 PM

Monday, May 05, 2008

Then there was...

Our eyes met and turned away
The streams of light were here to stay
Confounding distinction
Society bites back

The circle restricts
Yet substance cannot be restrained
Yet love, yet lost, yet lack,
Yet live, yet life, yet...

You.

eliZABeth 4:15 PM

Ten reasons why I want you to LEAVE

I was walking along the pond today all by me lonesome. Just then, some girl came up to me with her friend.
anonymous girl1: where're you going?
lizzay: TRCC
anonymous girl1: oh. what course you from? STA?
lizzay: yea. DSA
anonymous girl2: oh you play instrument? wad guitar?
lizzay: uh...piano, guitar and I sing
anonymous girl1: ya. she has the guitar look.

Shrug.

Meanwhile...
I was looking for JM chords, for the song waiting on the world to change.
The title of the ultimate guitar site was 'waiting on the world to change chords'

The big guy's humouring me today.

Bye ST. I can't wait to graduate because of you.

eliZABeth 4:00 PM

the L word

L___

you might get it right.

eliZABeth 1:12 PM

Bored. Really bored.

You.
Can.
Only.
Type.
One.
Word.

Not as easy as you might think.

1. Where is your cell phone?
Here

2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend ?
There

3. Your hair?
Black

4. Your mother?
Home

5. Your father?
Shrug

6. Your favorite thing?
These

7. Your dream last night?
None

8. Your favorite drink?
Heh?

9. Your dream car?
DREAM

10.say something about your life?
SOMETHING

11. Your ex?
Weird

12. Your fear?
God

13. Where do you want to be in 10years?
Stage

14. Who did you hang out with last night?
Mother

15. What you're not good at?
Stuff

16. Muffins?
PUFFIN

17. When you DIE, u'd rather beCREMATED or BURRIED?
Cremated

18. Where you grew up?
Sing

19. Last place you've been to last night?
Kovan

20. What are you wearing?
Underwear (bet you didn't expect that)

21. Where are you?
School

22. Your pet/s?
EARL

23. Your computer?
Laptop

24. Your life?
Life

25. Your mood?
Life

26. Missing?
SAM

27. What are you thinking about right now?
SAM

28. Your fav. color?
BLACK

29. Your work?
BLACK

30. Your summer?
Black

31. Your relationship status?
Black (haha)

32. Your favorite food?
Holy chicken soup with rice! Oh. One word. Darn it.
Matter

33. When was the last time you laughed?
Just

34. Last time you cried?
Yesterday

35. School?
COOL.

eliZABeth 12:37 PM

Holy chicken soup with rice!

Its just a nice Alex quote. You know Alex? The Naked Brothers Band's drummer?
Oh yea.

I saw Foo Lu Lu today. My goodness. Its one of the funniest things today.
Yes ONE OF.
Clement and Luke are SO hilarious.
We were talking about our "relational experiences" with some people. Boy was it gay. (No pun intended. REALLY)

New word of the day: Keetoes (Mosquitoes)

As you can see, I'm running out of things to blog SO...

bye for now.

Stupid keetoes. Stop sucking my blood.

eliZABeth 12:39 AM

Saturday, May 03, 2008

So many questions you can't answer

Lets play 51 questions. Only I don't have 51 questions.

What am I to you?

Do you still think about her?

Do you miss her?

How is it you're able to cope with your...a little?

Alright I can't do this thinking Shaun called his picture cute.

YOU'RE GOING DOWN DUDE, YA HEAR?

dsa-don't say ah...

I missed UT. Say it with me "Elizabeth Chia missed UT". You're screwed.

No I'm not.

Shh.

SHAUN SAID HE'S CUTE?! Is this the face of cuteness to you?

Oh stupid question. That would be a yes. Right Shaun?

PEACE.

eliZABeth 4:15 AM

Friday, May 02, 2008

Content

tetra_firestorm@yahoo.com.sg says:my foot smells like 40 yrs old
tetra_firestorm@yahoo.com.sg says:nv wash
lizzay.pretty sunsets and you says:WOT
Danielle, I can spell! I can spell! (: says:HAHHAHAHAH
lizzay.pretty sunsets and you says:*poke*
tetra_firestorm@yahoo.com.sg says:dats y i need go bathe now
tetra_firestorm@yahoo.com.sg says:brb
lizzay.pretty sunsets and you says:okay!
lizzay.pretty sunsets and you says:go bathe
lizzay.pretty sunsets and you says:eee
Danielle, I can spell! I can spell! (: says:hahah
Danielle, I can spell! I can spell! (: says:so dirty
lizzay.pretty sunsets and you says:wait mas selamat try to run past then he smell you and faint

Is it THAT entertaining?

eliZABeth 3:13 PM

Look what I found

I seriously don't know how to save this picture!!! TRICIA!!! This was all I could save from the quality I had to work with. Gah.
Well you see, I was blog surfing and I happen to be drawn to read Tricia's blog and look what I found!

Yes. Cool eh? XD a surprise birthday cake from vocal training.

whoopeedoo. I love you. XD I mean the cake. ITS SERIOUSLY NICE. Thank you dwight.

Labels: SUPPLIES

eliZABeth 11:57 AM

Thursday, May 01, 2008

My alien friend

what is this..."love" you talk about?

you know, I don't really know anymore.

is there really any reason to?

there is.

which is?

I wouldn't know.

Labels: So I thought

eliZABeth 8:44 PM

FamiLIES

oh yea. thats just what it is.

Not all families. Some have got really good people in them. Mine used to.
Well. Its all over now. She's gone. My mother's gone.

As we wave goodbye to the night lights
And step into the day
There's nothing you'd want more than the moon,
That comforting glow.
Her smooth silky beam caressing you,
Wiping your tears away.
In your joys, you forget about her
But when you come running with brine
And heartfelt heartbreak
She takes you in her arms and holds you
All she can
Until she fades away.

eliZABeth 3:35 PM